Secret Key Snail+EGF Repairing Mask Pack

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This is actually one of the samples I received from the lovely Alice over at W2beauty!

It’s my first sheet mask and man, I could not wait to tear into this thing. Except..wait. Snail. I know, I know, snail mucus is big in Korea. And really, only cultural context gets in he way of me using this comfortably. The french eat snails, Koreans wear snail slime, I accidentally step on them going down the sidewalk then start screaming as if I had just lost a foot. [Which I might as well have done, as I suffer self-to-foot rejection in the wake of that creepy-ass snail crunch.]

So I had to kind of prepare myself mentally for this. I started noting  gross things I’ve done before to compare how not-bad this would be. There was that time I accidentally drank my best friends spit out of a beer can, and the time I ate pregnant fish on a stick, and the time I went to the Philippines and just LOOKED at Balut, and the other time in the Philippines that I accidentally swam in a sewage outlet and had a 3 hour ride home in a crowded jeepney with 10 other people who swam in the same water. I also ate guinea pig once, but that didn’t taste awful.

So…processed snail slime didn’t seem bad. And it wasn’t.

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There was plenty of fluid in the pack, and the smell was OK. I’ve noticed a lot of powdery/ floral scents so far in my Korean products, and I’m more of a gourmand type of gal, but that’s okay. The fluid in the pack was slimy, to my horror. *Just think about that time you fell on petrified dog shit in San Francisco* I said.

The mask fit okay. It definitely is made for an Asian face structure. Wider across with lower set eyes, a shorter nose, and  plumper lips. Metaphorically, I felt like an A cup in a C cup, which is a nice change because I spend most of my days feeling like a D cup in a B cup. [Busty girls holla]

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I left the mask on for thirty minutes. It clung well, much like a snail to stucco. I experienced an odd tingling sensation while wearing it, but I checked my skin for redness and I seemed okay. So..when it came time to take the mask off, I picked up the packet to see if I should wash it or not. Since it’s all in Korean, I used the picture prompts. Easy enough, no?

Step one: Cleanse face. Check.

Step two: Unfold mask. Check.

Step three: Test mask on back of hand for reaction. I did not do this because I like to live dangerously  I’m lazy.

Step four: Put mask on face! Check

Step five: Put mask on face? Hold mask on? Mayday, mayday!

Step six: Mask is now skin. It was all a trick, the snails infused themselves into your body on a molecular level and you now must eat low-sodium foods for the rest of your life. Hands seem to have been petrified in the last three steps, resistance is futile.

So I took my best guess and washed it off. Results? Not bad. My skin felt moisturized, and kind of supple. Skin looked very bright, which I was happy with. But there was no additional softness or lasting results. I vote this as one of those special spa day items, best for using just for temporary moisture.

Rating: 2/5

Will I buy again? It was nice as a sample but I wouldn’t pay for it.

Did I laugh at my own jokes in this post? Unfortunately I’m still laughing.

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